What to say in an opening message on a dating site

And hey, some girls are into bad boys who live on the edge, risking life and limb for their lady loves. Dream3vil certainly makes an impression in his first message, and he even throws in a directive from a police officer to make it harder to refuse. You can get as imaginative as you want with it. Your first message should be indicative of your personality. Oliver loves putting pineapple on his pizza and joking around. His approach to online dating is playful and helps him quickly find someone who gets him. Such stereotypes can stop someone from getting to know you on a dating site where superficial judgments are common — but you can also use them to your advantage.

He also makes his intentions known, appealing to online daters with a rebellious side and a raunchy sense of humor. The whole message gets more and more ridiculous as it goes on, but the awkwardness seems intentional. What I also love about this message is he keeps it clean.

11 Online Dating First Message Examples That Get Responses

Last of all, we have I Hedonist making a self-deprecating joke on OkCupid. Oftentimes you can melt the hearts of jaded online daters with a clever quip or a quirky compliment. When she was growing up, her family teased her for being "boy crazy," but she preferred to think of herself as a budding dating expert. As an English major in college, Amber honed her communication skills to write clearly, knowledgeably, and passionately about topics that interest her.

Now with a background in writing, Amber brings her tireless wit and relatable experiences to DatingAdvice. Bait a Date With a Good Pun. The word pretty is a perfect case study for our point. But very pretty is almost always used to describe the way something or someone looks, and you can see how that works out. We took a close look at salutations.

The more informal standard greetings: There are many words on the effective end of our list like zombie , band , tattoo , literature , studying , vegetarian yes! Talking about specific things that interest you or that you might have in common with someone is a time-honored way to make a connection, and we have proof here that it works. Awkward , sorry , apologize , kinda , and probably all made male messages more successful, yet none of them except sorry affects female messages. A lot of real-world dating advice tells men to be more confident, but apparently hemming and hawing a little works well online.

It could be that appearing unsure makes the writer seem more vulnerable and less threatening. Now that you have demonstrated why you are messaging her you can briefly mention a few of your strongest characteristics to really get her hooked.

This may sound a little like bragging and it is but it is done in a confident way that is more matter-of-fact than arrogant. If you can demonstrate confidence early when messaging an older women you will have better results. This is where you give a little and take a little.


  • First Message Online Dating Formula That Works (With Examples)!
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In this example it was from a woman who said she was great at ping pong:. It is very easy to take a message the wrong way, even one that follows a first message online dating formula.

You need to find the right balance and it can take a little practice before you find it. This is where you seal it. You want her to get motivated to actually send you a message back.

There’s more to it than you think

My favorite line was:. This is a great way to connect with her and demonstrate that messaging you is in her best interest. She is on that site to meet someone great and that just might be you. Now that you have given her every reason to reply you tell her exactly what you want her to do. If you can get her to take the big step of messaging you back your odds have already increased tremendously.

7 types of online dating messages that get responses

I knew that would get your attention! I read through your profile and we seem to share a love of adventure, the feel of sand in our toes, and the taste of an authentic french croissant. I just got back from a life changing two week scuba retreat in Belize.