You will meet sadness again and again. Perhaps you just want someone to vent to. They are genuinely trying to help you because they think you want advice. This seems like quite a conflict of interest, and I imagine it must have been really hard to push your friend towards someone you love. Did your friend know you had feelings for the guy too? If so, did she care that by being with him, she would be making you unhappy? Did the guy know that you had feelings for him?
And was your friend unsure about him choosing her, which led to you having to convince her that she is worthy? You make it seem like there was an option for you to be happy that would make her miserable. What was that option? For you to be with him? They may even take it as a sexist remark.
If Her Best Friend Is A Guy, Don't Panic - Read This Instead
But I also recognize patterns. For thousand of years women have been attracted to guys with certain qualities. Attraction is an emotional response. Women have to FEEL the qualities that turn them on to a man. If a guy has massive amounts of PASSIVE attractiveness like physical looks, wealth, power, or social status — that can showcase those desireable qualities in itself. In the animal kingdom, almost every species has a courtship ritual in which males show their best selves to the females.
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Why would you lead with advice that works for the minority? They then expect girls to eventually realize how awesome they are. You may even give her gifts and pay for special outings. And wait some more. She may have had interest in you initially but you never encouraged those feeling to grow. You never flirted with her to make her feel desirable or aroused.
Her Best Friend Is A Guy
You never touched her so she felt close to you on a physical level. You never had any sexy banter or intimate discussion to get her thinking about sex.. In fact, you were so scared of embracing your own sexuality around her that she never felt any sexual feelings around YOU. They would rather wait for a strong man to take that initiative usually while they provide really subtle hints to encourage him. The only time this starts to change is with age — women over tend to get more forward.
Once you feel a connection, you have to lead with your interest. They spend months chatting a girl up at school or work before inviting her to do something together. Attractive women have lots of interested men. A confident man has the courage to take the next step. A man who leads conveys a lot to a woman. It reassures her that he can make the right, smart choices when necessary. It puts a lot of pressure on her to figure out the logistics with a new guy. Or that you ask her more personal and intimate questions. These all demonstrate a huge amount of self confidence.
What to Do When Your Boyfriend's Best Friend is a Girl
Suddenly, you try to lead and she hesitates or pushes back verbally. Now, at face value, things can seem pretty clear cut. So most guys just back down, get nervous, and even apologize. Regardless, the guys who can playfully reassure her through those moments, make her laugh, and continue leading without shame build more attraction.
Always playing it safe is a great way to make women feel comfortable around you. Along with trust, communication is an important building block for any relationship. And for the love of God, try not to over-analyze everything. Express your insecurities and ask for clarification when you need it, rather than wondering what exactly was meant by whatever either of them have said or done.
Not only will this help him understand how to keep you happy, it will also build the trust between you two so that you are stronger than ever. There is just something fundamentally different about friendships with guys and friendships with girls.
Who better to give advice on girls than a girl? If he knows how to relate to a girl best friend, he will likely be a good listener who knows how to treat a lady. So we have to do all this in order to accommodate his other woman… So much easier to just look for another guy. Not everything is about sex but do you really want someone who wants you mainly for the sex and his best woman friend is someone else?
I want someone nice. Your email address will not be published.
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